Hey I noticed something...

I have lost all my factual memory I learnt in secondary school oh no....Counting down, it's 10months after graduation (which wasn't really a memorable day) I had lost everything that includes my elementary and additional mathematics skills, my chemistry and physics. These were the subjects that I taken so much time in studying and nothing had retained in my memory.

It's always a pain to remember all the facts that i should have known!
this is how I really looked like

with that jia lat look, "what is it? What?"

So what I am making a point here is that, what I learnt in secondary school usually goes to waste if I dun use it. I bet my teachers are having a poor appetite now. I kept returning my knowledge back to them. I feel such a shame. Especially my Chinese and English languages.

The only subject that survives in my brain is my Biology.

Ahh...chewww....snif snif

* this may be a flu like symptom but it's not.

Call me superstitious. Call me weird and rediculous. The recent sneezes i had isn't as simple as what you think. It is the people talking behind my back. They are only talking but they are talking something bad, something embarrassing about me.
Warning: if you dun like reading this, you have the very most RIGHT to click the back button.



















I hate my secondary school. It's a damn and cursed place i tell ya. i would rather die than go back to this darned place. It is not only the building, it is the people that made a bad remark out of it. 70% of the hatred go to my lower secondary life.

You still here? you dun like what i am typing? Click the back button before you regret















you wanna know why? It is the prejudiced discriminatory behaviour students put on to me. They have this self-fulfilling stereotype mindset in their bloody heads. Would you ever want people to have such behaviour against you? No? Think again, i was suffering in silence for 2 long years. When people see embarrassment as a joke. When people see you they think of been unclensed and dirty. What is worse, the principal only wants success and she doesn't understand any student's feelings. Doesn't this sounded crazy? A principal that is so robotic. They say school is fun, i say school is horror.

you know what? that day after the results, i not only threw the uniform out of the window but step it, no i did a stanpede and made it like a piece of rotten rag. I shouted out loud, " Good bye lousy school!!!"

I never went back to that swamp ever since.

So.. you are still here to read my fury.

This is to those who have been talking behind my back:
I know you've got this mindset stuck on your episodic memory, however please accept my token of sacarsm to all of you: Go and kiss your friend's ass

those of you who have felt that what i said had made a mark on your heart, i've already recommended you to stop reading earlier. These three words are for you:

you deserve it!

Ok that felt good. Some of you may doubt whatever I am publishing in my blog is false. here's a disclaimer for all of ya.



Disclaimer: the content above is total based on experience and none of them were from made up stories. In any event, my entry will not be liable to any damage whitch also include spiritual and emotion damage.

Arghh.. That darned sociology test

Just had my sociology semestral exam this afternoon and i can't stop feeling angry. That question,

"how does howard define divance?"

This is crazy, who say this or that type of question is so purely on history and not sociology. I must curse the setter of that paper and my friend who did pure memorising could just say it out like a computer. grr... I can't stand it...Nothing in this world is got to do with thinking. For example, Is wearing pyjamas to school a deviance? explain your reason or What makes a person deviant?. A question like these are so simple for a person who thinks and analyses.

The other question was like another lifted from text question. I always hated those questions. They are meant for idiots who can't think. I think this setter is equally idiotic,

"da da somebody stated that good things come out from bad behaviour. discuss."

Oh great! one of those mindless question. I bet this person is from a person that just passed his phD and came here as a darn stepping stone.

Here i am venting my anger but isn't blogging a way of stress relief? You would be saying that i am so stupid not to memorise all these text. I have one good character that no body has, a person that don't plagiarize. I hate to copy from people although sometimes i think i have to. but literally wise, i have a personality. I find that I am a really lazy person when it comes to exam because i dun do pure memorised work. I rewrite, find examples to understand or look through the textbook for more info.

I dun care who say this or that because that darn person only holds 2-3 sentences and a slide in my lecture notes. If i see that the person is highlighted in the textbook like nobody's business, then might as well do some minor memory encoding. Yesterday's exam was the nursing process, and i was so glad that all it's question was thinking type none were solely like today's.

Enough of regrets, nothing can be done to this mysterious mindless setter. Next is biological science and its another memory work again but this time i shall prepare my answers. Although i've learnt 'O' level biology before, the focus is totally different. The anatomy is so complex and difficult to spell the darned words. Such as this word:

Rhomboideus

a darn muscle that protract the scapula/shoulder bone. I can't even pronounce it properly, how am i suppose to spell it? Damn those latins/greeks . Can't they invent an easier name? Like Romboidus, much easier right?

This is what makes my life very difficult. Another one muscle that flexes and adducts the shoulder:

Cocracobrachialis.

Why dun you try pronouncing that. An easier word would be cocoabranch. haha :D oh even better cocoakrunch a breakfast cereal. I shall stop making fun of these names.

I can't concentrate blogging in an evironment full of noise. Noise you that can't imagine, guess:

drilling?
techno?
metal music?
chicken cries?
killing a chicken noise?
void deck karaoke?
neighbour fighting?
the desperate calls of your baby brother?
the clashed computer?
lousy singing? you're near.....



Still haven thought of it yet? well, all the answers above are wrong. It's intrumental noise, noise by a lousy player. A player that has bad listening and has no professional training. a player that wrack the instrument like his naughty boy. I feel sorry for that instument. to the poor instrument: please accept my sympathy.

Security guards, the call of slackers

I have a very strong hatred towards security guards. Those people that wear a sky blue coloured shirt and simply, zhuo bo (do nothing). Usual list of things they do:

1. walk around
2. stand around
3. sit at the door like a men shen (door god)
4. find fault to catch any folkways that you did
5. stop people unnecessary for no particular reason
6. persistent behaviour

I just can't stand their discrimatory behaviour. Letting the Caucasian do what ever they want and not us, locals. Are you trying to promote hospitality? Well, you are far from it. Here's an incident I want to emphasize on security guard stupidity.

This happened a few months back when I was working for this "John Little Warehouse Sale" at the expo. It was the last sales day, my friend and I were almost late. I suggested going through the front entrance to the staff area. We were running in the mist of the crowd and a chief security guard stopped us. With that unshaved beard and niao ka peng character, i knew the this guy isn't worth arguing. His face was flooded with white brown hair, eyes gluing straight at you. This ass tugged my friend's bag.

"Are you working here?" His voice was firm and angered. It seem that he needed something to find fault with or he would feel really bored standing at the gate like a statue.

"Ah-huh.." My friend replied. Eveready to run to the staff area. I was at the moment starring at the beard creature.

"Please go to the back and use the staff entrance." He pointed his back. The words " go to the back" made us run away from this nothing-better-to-do asshole. We went separate ways to distort this old man. Unfortunately, he tugged my friend's blue bugis-bought bag. It was so precious to her. As a good friend i walked towards that man who was still tugging my friend's precious.

He started, " Why were you running?" This time his voice was fiercer.

At this moment i thought that raising that voice of his doesn't worth to be heard by me. I splat, " we are late, so issit wrong to run?"

This despicable man was so persistent that my friend scolded "Chou chee bye" loudly at his stinking hairy face. So we walked out and came in from the cashier checkout area which was only a few meters away from the entrance.

I better he was only trying to do something fun and scolding us would make him feel like a superior to all of the staff working at the expo.

I shall end here. See me 2 weeks later (exams are here)

So furious today.

He set a small flame. Wanting to find a way out of problems. For he never know this little flame is a root to all problems. He knows that doing such an idiotic thing can spark a fight and abornormal cell growth; the growth of conflict. Even knowing, he moves deeper into the wilderness of an endless fight.



Boom! He stupidly get himself into a trouble that cannot be amended . The raging heat and the everlasting anger isn't gona stop if he doesn't stop been impersonal. Selfishness and self-centered people are hard headed. Nothing ever changes their minds. Simpeltons. Why dun you give in? And save your breath to create a win-win situation.

I was as infuriated as the burning forest. Engulfing everything, not leaving a single trace. Why must i give in to a mindless jerk? Hatred started crowding my senses as he starts adding fuel to fire; repeats like a broken record, a parrot, a mindless freak, a 3 yr old! "You dare say that again? Come on, try!" Id reactions can occur!

I will slap him the number of times he repeated those despicable words

Seeing this picture makes me feel great. ah.. "Wake up! I hate you, go and die. I hope you throw out blood that fills the whole of singapore's reservoir.

A touch of my signature.


"Get real!"


This is so fun... This is actually a make-up story. Conciousness takes over my actions, it controls my temper. I always hate guys. They are all so heartless and simple minded at preoperational stage of life. They are still in dream land never to wake up.

What the.. The sound dun work?

I am desperately crying for music. The computers in my school really need AVA backup! ok, you may be thinking, "Why don't you use the computers at home?"

Answer:

My home computers is so overly used and I keep getting distracted by my family members who talk to me. Secondly, I use music to study but I have such a wide variety of interest. Simply buying albums from the store and playing it on my disc man doesn't work, I get bored easily. Thirdly doing this is such a waste of my time

Question:

Hey, why not play radio from your disc man?

Answer:

Are you joking? Singaporean radio are full of chatting and lame techno music which i dun like. Nobody ever thought of having a radio station solely on top music. Our radio is so limited too!

Question:

Have you tried replacing the headphones?

Answer:

The headphones dun work and my school computer kept emitting sound. Once i had it with exchanging the plugs, I go nuts. And i give up. Wait a sec, why am i asking these silly questions? I need time, man! Time to wake up and get on my feet to start studying. Got ta go.

huh, a sky so blue? Argh.. I am late!

Damn, i woke up suddenly to find out that I was so late! 4 mins after the start of the lesson which was at 8.00am. The only time i woke up was at 6.00 am just to off my alarm clock and i went back to bed. Once i got into another phase of non-rapid eye movement(NREM), I think i shall never wake up again in 2 hours time. I rarely get this type of phase during mornings and this morning was exceptional. My mom could not wake me at all.

You would be wondering why.

here is your answer. I got the best dream since years. I dream that my essay got an A and whoa! My lecturer even put a good remark on it which i forgot what it was. The best thing was that i was the only one that had an A. So outstanding. Haha... I love fantasy in my dreams. I saw many failed essays. To add, my lecturer praised me like i was the top student. Gees.. Dreams are always there to movtivate you to excel.

Hey wait, I think i keep getting dreams related to that essay. The person i used in my essay was my most hated teacher in my life. She was the one that tortured me during my elementary school days: primary 6. She instill all the fear and hatred in me which made me have a hostile approach to all teachers.

Back to my dream, this teacher was measuring height and weight for the whole class. I can't believe in my dream she still bullying me. I feel so angry! how can she still do that to me? Never mind. I bet she will get a retribution soon.

Talking about dreams, i have reoccurance of my dad who passed away just last year. It never show any sad images of him. Moreover, happy moments together that we shared joy and laughter. The numerous LAN games we played together including TFC (Team fortress Classic), Counter strike.

I am so glad my unconciousness remembers everything happy and nothing sad. *sob*

Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix Spoiler

Enough of this. My friend brought up my favourite book: Harry Potter to me recently. The fifth book i thought was the fastest book i ever read in my life. It was so interesting and i could like stop all my physiological needs (emptying my bladder, water, etc.) just to finish this book. I couldn't believe Rowling had to kill a character i like the most in that book.I could not take this blow in the first few weeks after i read the book.

Sirius Black portray a more handsome person than the one showed in the movie. Imagine Harry's only kin that he talks to the most honestly, is gone. Many people in the Forum had expressed their sorrow towards our ever loving character. one said that this death is a big climax of Rowling's story.

Well i bet it have to be. It had such a big impact on me. Recently, I read an article that Rowling is going to kill another character in book six: Harry Potter and the Half-blooded Prince. I hope it ain't someone i will grow interest in.

Alright i shall end here. Back to my studies.

I am so tempted.

I used to search around Singapore for a pair of colourful converse shoes. The bad things is that, I dun have the heart to spend my money on such things. Now i have a different view, once i have got some money from a holiday job, i shall buy expensive stuff. Just have to wait. All i can do is to pia OT. haaha.

Just have a look at these shoes!


This one can melt any person's heart that is a fan of converse. those red beans so cool and matching hehe. Once you see the next one, i think you would think i am crazy about shoes.


It's got my favourite colour: pink. This shoe is so unique from others. Just take a look at this one


This is not only pink, IT'S MY FAVOURITE PINK: MILKY PINK. It's so classy looking. If only i've got the money. Grrr...

My class started at a dreaded hour of the morning, 8.00am. It so early and my mind wasn't awake at that time. And as you know the train is always packed with people. When i saw on the plasma screen it wrote: 3mins and my mind automatically say," damn it"

As i went inside, I have to be sandwiched (as usual!) in between people. My mind was in a preconcious state. As I looked at the side of me there was this huge and muscular arm staring at me. I even thought, " wow, who's that." I looked up. wah! The best part was that his side view was of Bae Yong Jun's(korean actor) Face. Cool!

Imagine brad pit's arms and bae yong jun's face. So idealistic, a true perfect person outwardly. If i get to see his full face then i would know if my predictions were right. Damn.

New layout! Plain and easy to read.

Just looking around blogspot, the skins they use all come in common.

1. words too small
2. everything is squeezing here and there
3. Complicated
4. messy
5. words are too packed
6. layout takes years to load

Yup. These factors makes a lousy blog. Having these factors creates a word in a blogder's head, "BORING!" within 5 seconds the blogder gets bored. So wad makes a good blog? in my opinon.

1. Many pictures: pictures catch reader's attention
2. many paragraphs: Easy to read
   
3. a decrease usage of "...": these things bores people
4. Simple layout: help the reader find content faster

Can anyone comment on my blog's layout and content?

Successful. How do you define it?

I read through an article on "ITE top student, achieved success". Unfortunately i saw it on an english paper advertising for a tamil newspaper. By looking at the title, many would be inspired to grab the paper to have a look who had grown out from the dense patch of grass and had seen the light of success. To me, I think having good education doesn't mean you have achieved success. What matters, is the amount of money you earn! Good education is just the beginning. What everyone has to strive for is flexiblity during a time of crisis, a conflict and a date line. As my mom used to say, "Iron rice bowl". The fortune to eat 3 meals a day is so essential.

Some reflections on what my Lecturer.

today, I realised that I am a critic. i am sceptical and my agreeable level is below average. When someone gives a point i usually think over them before allowing my ears to continue to absorb the information. My clinical lecturer made me so pissed because all the things she said were making me feel angry.

"All of you must know that the course you have taken is different from other courses. Take for example, engineering. The robot broke down will you be sued by court? In nursing, if you give the wrong medicine and the patient die, will you get sued?"She lectured. I mean like what about our nicoll highway engineer? engineering isn't just about robots! She isn't judging things fairly. That engineer is in great trouble is also because of neglience. My god! Who says designing is save from any court case? What if he draws a picture that others percieved as racism, an insult? I mean this also implies to country-relations.

What else? Ah something said about drawing a garfield in to a smurf will create laughter but what about big fans of garfield (like me!) and smurfs? This is where the conflict theory of sociology come in. *sigh* Yes i agree with her that nursing is a very delicate job as what she had said, 1 silly mistake can cost a life. No mistake allowance at all! What can i do, i have the passion for seeing people recover, haha. When people recover their face brightens up and gives you the only smile in his face after his discharge.

Here are a few things i found in the net that look cool!

Shocked? These things are supposed to be motivating you but alas... I totally agree with this. haha. Only if you are the ones that dream and make no effort to do something about it.


This one is so true, procastination refers to me. I will never be movtivated to study only if the exams are 3 days away.Sad but true, i've always wanted to be someone who don't procastinate. But nevertheless, me is me, this is my unique personality. I even wanted to write a book for procastinators haha since there are so many books on study guidiance which practically don't work on people like me.

Cool stuff! these things are called demovtivators. Well i've finished my essay, but my friend jane says my language doesn't have the flow. My god! I became flabbergasted, i mean like i know my use of language isn't good but this statement sure motivated me to read more books in the holidays to come. *sob*. I feel that I have been lagging behind these days on my language. Whats more i only excel in science and maths during my secondary school days so dun bully me on literary stuff. I won't be able to get what you mean most of the time.

Language is so useful nowadays and the worse of all i sucked at it. Don't let me get started on my second language. Nature has showed me a path of excellence in a career of science orientated. Textbooks quoted "Nursing is a form of science" but i still feel that nursing is so language orientated as for communication and the appropriate use of words is equally important.

As all of you have noticed, i have very shallow interest. Now that i have an interest in another type of music. Top 40 pop songs: Maroon 5, Avril lavigne... I do know this interest will last less than 3 months. But the advantage for such a personality is I can change my interest according to yours if i see the need. The disadvantage is that i get influence easily! That sucks!

Arghh... Not 1200 words yet.

I am crying my ass out just for this essay. I rewrite my essay on communication on paper twice and another time on MSword here are a list of things that kept hesitating me to write more.

1. The use of narrative phrases. I am so used to using all the narrative sacarstic phases to add colour to my essay but what am I trying to fool? This is a argumentative essay. narrative phases are out of the question.
2. Thinking of the question which is so narrow makes me narrow my use of ideas. like "how can communication help create a strong relationship?" this type of questions are so narrow that you are left with only afew words to write. I think the person that wrote that question is a narrow-minded person.
3. Thinking about the narrow-minded lecturer that is so petty! This cannot, that cannot. You can write nothing but crap in your essay. To think she was the one who failed my practical test.
4. Books had nothing to write about my topic.
5. call me dumb but i can write better if referencing wasn't included in the essay requirement
6. I love being different and following rule on the format of writing is so difficult for me. It's against my free will
7. What's more? 6 reasons is enough to piss you off!

You can't believe how i manage to write until 1100 words. It was pure sweat and blood. Ok i agree, i am abit whiny today but you can't blame me as i am having a hard day. My pain, my anguish, my fustration and my disappointment on this puke-worthy essay.

First of all, ah-hem... My earhole on the left ear that was pireced last 4 week was gone to waste!! It heal back only a few hours of studless life. the stud came off in the night and that was like a few hours. Guess what i did? I used my pirecing stud to poke the skin so that i could get my hole back(ouch) . *sigh* Another 4 weeks to suffer.

That pain wasn't as painful as a skeletal muscle pain. I don't mean one spot but various spots including my backside, my detoid muscle, my tigh and so on... All i did today was to act like a restricted toy robot. Squating was a great challange to me. Talking about this pain it was all because i kept playing badminton from 10.30am to 2pm. and that's not all! from 7.30to 9.00 that's like how many hours? 5 hours of badminton.

My type of badminton issit just a "statue" game but running back and forth. And there's this idiot that tortured me. He shot a V-shape trick and made me ran from point A to B. And what's worse, he even made me run back and forth. imagine!!!My legs were like beancurd! Ok, me the useless idiot. I just knew that i could not smack! I am too good of a person, i DUN KNOW HOW TO DO A SMACK! So i practiced with my cousins in the evening the ways of smacking a shuttlecock.

So problem 2 is activity intolerance. third is Diarrhoea! Mom gave me eat a few Seedless and skinless grapes and i had stomach aches. Imagine muscle ache adding to stomach ache. That's like "ouch" to you but to me is "Wah piang! Jin Tia ah!" Hard day isn't it?

Here some pics to share to all of ya.

Ignore the date. Let me introduce, This is my hamster bui bui. ain't he cute? It took me various effort to get him to sit still like this.

OR Else....

He would be stuggling like this. It really made me mad. But How can i show my anger to such an adorable thing, that won't bite and lets you touch him for the sake of his fur.

Try touching this animal below!

This is boss kuala from melbourne, australia. doesn't he look like someone that is about to fire anyone that crosses his line. So, don't irritate this guy!

My name? more than just equality.

My father named me as my first name. means been graceful and means to even up. I find that my name is very meaningful. It is so typical for parents to give their daughter's name that means either intelligence and beauty. I feel so unique in the sense that my name doesn't under any of these catergory. The word has a direct translation being even. But i find that what my father wants me to be is to be less one-sided and quick to judge. On the other hand, my life is not too bad nor too good.

I found out my usual test results would point the B grade. And i had an A for my bio pract and a B for my bio theory. I am such a B product. Although I felt regretful but still the other side of me was saying that B is enough. Because if the next time i take another of these tests and if (touchwood!) i get a D my heart would be devastated. Having high standands isn't good in my opinon, it adds another stress factor to you. No one wants to have such unnecessary stress during their study period.

Therefore my name is so meaningful, even effects of good and bad of life.

Some cool photos to show all of ya!


Cute cousin hehe... Giving us a kissing look. I ask him to wear a skirt just for show and he did it! haha!!!

Learning to dance like a girl. haha. Needs practice though. Hey, dun say i bully him ok! He's doing it at his free will.



Stunning evening skies! the colour of my favourite blue, though it wasn't taken very well.

PS: I need help, do any of you know where is the best place to store pictures and have unlimited bandwidth so that i can directly link it!

A sudden flip from happy week to stress week

Just thinking about my sweet week I had, i could remember the times i slack at home with no worry flies pestering me. Now, work started piling up on me from months ago. I am so glad i had my weekend worthy. Shopping with my mom is cooler than with anybody else

1. A great decisive source
2. She knows what you want
3. She's got the $$

Too bad, good times never last long. Last but not least, today i am too tired to blog so please pardon me for this short entry

Common Loophole Words Said By People

As mentioned before in the last post, not everything people say is totally agreeable. We must be sceptical! Such as "Money is not always everything". This, of course is explain in the last entry.
Phrases like "life is short, so why not enjoy first", I will only apply to unhealthy food, gambling and all the stuff that can have negative effects in life. Let me explain why this is a total crap using the unhealthy food example. Nothing is unhealthy until you lose you control on. A buffet offer of $4 per person. Anyone would be tempted to eat it almost every meal. Someone at the side would be saying, "Hey, why hesitate? life is short, so why not enjoy first." So you will regret in the end because you are sure to suffer than live a quality life, always geting insulin jabs or if you get renal failure, erm.. It's better die than live as you are always stuck to a dialysis machine or the stupid plain type of diet. AND I REALLY MEAN TASTELESS FOOD. I am bound to cry my ass out! you can't even eat something as simple as rice. The keyword here is "suffering", a word worse than "Death".

Hooray! My 2nd brother bought me The Sims 2 original as my late birthday present, what a nice brother I have. He's always willing to do such priceless sacrfices to his sister. Awww... I am so touched. No words can describe a unique person like him. Gotta try my new game now! tata! Jealous?